The wedding was absolutely gorgeous.  By far, the most beautiful wedding I’ve ever attended.

But now to the good stuff.  :)

Remember this post?  Or how about this picture from this post:

In both of those posts, I had gotten up to about 210lbs.

Needless to say, when I went to the Carolina Weight Management Clinic at the beginning of June, I weighed a whopping 215lbs. I was miserable. Completely, utterly, miserable. I was wearing a size 1X. Yes folks, that’s PLUS SIZE! It was very depressing and I felt completely defeated.

I hit the ground running and began to lose weight and feel better immediately. The first week I did a fast. I consumed five protein shakes and two quarts of water each day. I lost 8.9lbs the first week! By the time the wedding rolled around, seven weeks later, I was down 20lbs and two dress sizes. I now weigh 195 and wore a size 14 dress to the wedding. That is still a long way to my goal, but I’m thrilled to be comfortable in my clothes again, back into normal Misses sizes, and well on my way back into single digit sizes. Best of all, I’ve really changed my worst habits. I drink mostly water now. I get Starbucks no more than once a week, if that. We rarely eat fast food anymore; even my children. It’s going great.

I’m now doing the “modified fast” which consists of two protein supplements and one normal sized healthy meal a day along with two quarts of water.

I will keep you posted, but probably not weekly; maybe monthly.

Here are two pics from the wedding :)

with my sweet Momma

and a sweet picture of my dad with my boys:

~audrey

I’ve really enjoyed the last two months with Josh and the boys. It’s hard to believe it’s been two months since our last foster children left.

The boys and I have been in a pretty good routine with pool days, a little school work, keeping the house clean livable, and the normal church commitments.

When I was a child, I can remember moving my bedroom furniture around several times a year. Dresser, desk, and bed. I always did it by myself. Never asked permission. I liked little changes that felt like something new. I don’t know why our flesh longs for newness so often. Why can’t we just be content with “the same”? Ironically, I’m not fond of big change; only small.

Lately, I’ve been craving some small changes around my house. I’d really like to get in the garage and tear it to pieces. Our shelves have lost their organization, my “laundry station” is a wreck, and apparently the garage floor has recently become the place to throw things when the door bell rings and you weren’t expecting company, so you throw the big stuff into the garage and the rest goes in a closet! I’ve been wanting to paint my china hutch white and change out the old bronze hardware for elegant, crystal knobs and pulls from Hobby Lobby. I’m thinking if I buy one knob a week with my 40% off coupon, I’ll be able to finish the hutch by next summer! HAHA!

My living room is boring me as well. It’s so dark. The walls are khaki colored, my window treatments are brown, my couches are brownish, and of course my carpet is brown. Yuck! I do like brown, but the walls need to be more exciting. I don’t really have any ideas yet…partly because there will be a lot of furniture to move and seven window panels to take down before I could even get started.

I recently purchased some really great throw pillows from ROSS for $5.99/each. They are cream and brown zebra stripes and the fabric is raw silk, which makes them a little dressier than the poor, abused pillows that came with our couches.

One of the biggest issues I have with my husband our house is unfinished projects. I just need to start tackling them one at a time, starting with the smallest, which at the moment would be my bathroom.

Well, I rambled on much longer than I anticipated. The bottom line is, I would like for most things in my life right now to stay the same, but I’m ready for some little changes.

Now, it’s 2:00am. I had two glasses of sweet tea at dinner and here I am, wide awake at 2:00 in the morning. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME??

My best friend from high school/college is getting married in ten hours…more on that later.

good night…or shall I say morning.

~audrey

I honestly didn’t think I’d ever have to write this post, but deep down, I always knew that our adoption of the girls was hanging by a thread…no thanks to the broken system called the Department of Family and Children Services.

Here is what went down yesterday:

We’re providing respite care for another foster family in our agency at the end of the month. That basically just means we’re babysitting their foster kids for about 24 hours. My case worker had to come by the house so I could sign a paper stating what we’ve agreed to and that we have room for their two foster children.
After I signed the paper, she said,

“I have bad news. Chatham County called and they’ve discovered that the girls have family members living in Augusta and apparently they are just as crazy and dangerous as the birth parents. They no longer feel it would be safe to move them here. I’m sorry. It’s over.”

I was kind of numb for a few minutes. After she left, I teared up and literally shed one tear. I’ve known all along that this adoption has been on sinking sand. Between the girls’ family history and the unreliable people at DFCS in Savannah, nothing was guaranteed. But still, I’ve held onto hope, decorated their room, buying a few pieces of clothing here and there (on clearance of course!), and we’ve been praying for them by name daily for months. Here are some other thoughts and emotions I’ve encountered over the last several months:

As much as I looked forward to the girls coming, I also grieved over the thought of never being pregnant again. Josh always told me we could have another baby after the girls got here, but I wasn’t sure I really wanted six children. I also grieved over my foster parenting “career” being over. Once the girls got here, we wouldn’t be able to foster anymore because our house would be full. It didn’t feel like it should be over yet. We’ve only helped six children. It’s only been a year. As the news of the girls sunk in, the Lord began to give me hope and even joy. The girls will end up exactly where God intends them.

We are now an “open” foster home again and could get another placement any day now. We can still adopt! We can continue to pray that the Lord would lead us in whatever direction he wants our family to go. Whether it be to adopt from DFCS, adopt a future foster placement, or I can get pregnant again!! It took us a year to get pregnant with Owen and nothing guarantees that the Lord intends us to have anymore biological children, but at least I feel that door has been opened again.

All I know is that I have an aching heart for children; hurting children, needy children, foster children, orphan children, and now I know that my ministry to these children can continue. God is so good. His mercies are new every morning. He is my tower of refuge and strength.
Today, I will pack up all of the girlie clothes and items that are in the foster children’s’ room and return them to their rightful rubbermaid bin. We will no longer refer to that room as “the girls’ room“. Instead, it is a wrapped gift, unsure of what it will hold next.
I’m quite excited about what the next several months will hold. God’s word says He works all things together for good to those who love Him, and in my dictionary, “all” means “every, the whole of, the greatest possible”…it means ALL THINGS!

That is exciting.

Time for a cup of coffee.

~audrey

Kind of like the ticker at the bottom of the screen on news stations that keeps going and going and has great little snipits (ooh, spell check didn’t like that word!) of information. That’s all this post is going to be…

*The boys are in swimming lessons for the next two weeks. Jesse cries everyday because he’s scared of diving in seven feet. I’ve already told him, I don’t care if he learns how to dive, but he does have to try everything else. He seems to be rather paralyzed with fear once the class starts. He’s actually an excellent swimmer and quite fearless when he’s not pressured.

*Jesse recently asked me, “Momma, is that place behind your knee called your leg pit?” That kid never stops thinking of the next thing to make us laugh…although I think he was serious with that one!

*I gave our foster agency a fair warning: If you don’t give us some more babies soon, we’re going to resort to making our own! …yes, I really did say that. However, I’m pretty close to the girls in our agency, so they took it lightly, just as I intended. :)

*Josh has been offered a worship leader position at another church and it has turned into one of the hardest decisions we’ve ever had to make….still undecided.

*We’re officially through with our kids’ birthdays for this year. In the last month, Owen turned three and Jesse turned six. Good grief that is crazy!! Kristy, it really is true: One day they’re a baby, the next day they’re in kindergarten!

*God blessed Josh with a good summer bonus and we were able to pay off three debts in full! Three steps closer to DEBT FREE!!

*My dad rejoined the reserves for four years in order to get his full military retirement. As a result, he’ll be leaving for Iraq in March. That will be strange.

*I had a dream about our little girls last night. They had brown hair, brown eyes, and beautiful olive skin. They looked like twins. Lord, does all of this dreaming and nesting mean they’re coming soon?? My heart aches for them to be home where they belong.

*I haven’t swept my kitchen floor in a week. That might be a record for me. But in my defense, we’ve hardly been home long enough to do anything! We’re coming straight home after swimming today, Owen will take a nap, and I will do some serious cleaning. I’m looking forward to it already.

*I’ve been in the mood to repaint some rooms in my house. I think I’ll start in my bathroom since it’s small…I just don’t know when. :)

Happy Wednesday.

As strange as it sounds, sometimes I still can’t believe these are mine. God is so good. (Liza, this picture is for you! More to come :)

~audrey