Realizing

Don’t you hate it when you back yourself into an uncomfortable corner and things start to spiral and all the while you realize you’ve done it completely by yourself.

That seems to be what I’ve done.

Part of the battle we face as homeschoolers, is learning when to say ‘no’, keep your plate (ie: schedule) clean, and just stay home and focus on your priorities.

I’ve been in a funk lately. Another roller coaster ride of whether or not our foster children would be leaving this past week, my mom’s surgery, a pregnant friend in crisis, and it’s the week before my cycle. I think I’ve come to grips with the fact that I just need to be quarantined during the week leading up to my period. I’ve never been a hormonal person with many symptoms of PMS. I’ve always just glided right through the waves of female life. But I was just talking yesterday with Ashley about how hormonal I’ve been lately. Always on edge with annoyance in my voice. I want so desperately to be rid of that. It doesn’t take long for my children to begin mimicking my tone of voice in their communication to one another and that’s when it hurts the most.

The last few weeks have been chock-full of play dates and visits to my mom. As a result, we’ve had more days outside the home than in. Our schooling has gotten way off track and we’ve been tending to rush to get finished so we can move on to the “fun stuff”, like today for example, we’re heading to a friend’s house to play in 30 minutes. I cannot cancel this play date. My sanity depends on it. However, I cannot let this happen any more. What my sanity really depends on is extra time in the Word. Extra time on my face before the Father, depending on Him to make me a better wife and mother; increasing my patience and helping me along my journey to a meek and quiet spirit.

Next week our plate is clean. We will stay home and get back to the important, simple things.

Happy Thursday!

~audrey

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